Here comes Baby!!!

So I called Mike and told him that the doctor wanted to admit me that night to induce me the next morning. I think he was more freaked out than I was. He had a terrible cold and was afraid about giving it to the new baby. But like it or not she was coming!! Because of the warm antibody problem the doctors really wanted her out of me. So I went home and packed a bag. That evening they placed a vaginal suppository to help with the dilation and effacement I guess. I also got a nice Ambien (sleeping pill) and got the last good night's sleep that I can remember. The next morning I went into the labor and delivery rooms and they started the Pitocin drip - I was going to try and be a hero and go without an epidural as long as possible. Hardy har har. More about that later.

So things progressed at what seemed like a nice rate. They started the medication at about 9am and I remember I was talking to my father at about 11 or 11:30am when my water broke. That was such a strange feeling. Not really like peeing yourself but close! And it felt like it would never stop coming out! There is a kind of funny story when my sister was having her daughter and her water broke- it was my mom, my grandmother, my sister and I in the delivery room and one of us mentioned that the amniotic fluid had a very odd but familiar odor to it. The doctor was in the room and said - "Oh yeah- it smells like semen." My 80+ year old grandmother them gets a funny look in her eyes and says "Oh yes that's what it is." To say I was mortified /intrigued to find out the grandma and grandad were still tripping the light fantastic is an understatement. I will remember that until the day I die.

But back to me- after the water broke I had a string of visitors I wasn't really hurting that bad, at some point Mike left with his sister to do God knows what and left me with my sister. At about 2pm I really started to feel it. They had checked me an hour earlier and I was dilated to like a 4. One hour later I was at a 9. I was really feeling it now and started to panic. No one tells you this but labor doesn't so much feel like period cramps- for me it felt more like I had to go poopie really bad- but the turd was 6 and a half pounds and pressing on my lower back. Not a pleasant sensation at all!! Mike was still gone- I thought - "that jackass is going to miss the whole thing if he doesn't get back soon." So I lost it- I tried a shot of Demerol and that did nothing. So I gave in and called in the anesthesiologist for my epidural. What a relief!!
Mike finally showed back up right as they are telling me its time to push at about 4:30 or 5pm. I pushed for only about 1 hour not too bad by my estimation. And out popped Vivian. Mike and my mother were in the room at least Mike was. My mom in her infinite bad timing decided that she needed to wash her hands 2 seconds before the baby popped out! I had been looking in the mirror and all I remember thinking was - oh my God look at the size of my Coochie! Not cute. Mike said that when Viv came out it looked like she was coming out of the Schlitterbahn ( a water slide in South Texas). She was so tiny- she looked so grumpy when she came out - kind of like her daddy when he gets woken up from a good nap. She immediately peed on the doctor and started screaming!! Yea!!
The whole thing felt so surreal - perhaps it was the drugs pumping through the epidural but I remember lying there thinking - oh my God what do I do now! She was so little and so loud and so REAL. I never thought this day would come. But December 29th, 2004 I became a Mommy!

Bumps in the Road- miscarriage scare, and what the hell are "warm antibodies?"

So things were moving right along- I had to take those damn progesterone shots everyday- not fun I tell you. The progesterone is oil-based and VERY thick- so it was a little like taking peanut butter injections- my butt was a mass of lumps and bruises- VERY attractive I'm sure. I felt fine otherwise though. So on May 13th we had the 1st of many sonograms and there was only one embryo in there with a very strong heartbeat. We felt very hopeful but even then i wasn't celebrating too much- I knew that so many things can go wrong! And wouldn't you know it on May 19th when I was only 5 weeks along I was at work and when I went to the bathroom I started gushing blood. I just knew that was it. I was miscarrying. I ran out of work and called my husband and my mother and told them to meet me at the doctor. They were going to take me in for an immediate sonogram. The baby was still okay with a very strong heartbeat. But there was a huge pocket of blood called a subchorionic hematoma which if it continued to bleed would cause me to have a miscarriage. The OB/Gyn (Dr. Fogwell) told me that I had a 50/50 chance of miscarrying the baby. Then told me to go home and try bed rest- although he also said that bed rest probably wouldn't make anything better. Bed rest was more like a psychological band aid- it makes you feel like you are at least doing something to help in a helpless situation. By the next day I no longer had the bright red blood - I was now just having a small amount of brownish blood- I took this as a good sign. Like I wasn't bleeding anymore- and this was just the old stuff coming out. I spoke with the nurse at my infertility doctor's office and she told me that I should try not to worry too much because this problem is fairly common after having IVF- she acted like it was no big deal. This made me feel a whole lot better after all the miscarriage talk from Dr. Fogwell. I had an appointment with a perinatologist (doctor who specializes in troubled pregnancies basically) the following day and they did a very fancy ultrasound. He (Dr. Patton) told us that the baby looked strong and that the bleed looked small and inactive. He told us our chances were great that everything would be OK! I even wrote in my little pregnancy journal that day " We feel better - but I will be happy when all the blood is gone and this 1st trimester is over . This kid is freaking me out!"
I have to mention my Aunt Carolyn gave me a little medallion and a novena card for Saint Gerard right around the time we were getting into this whole thing. Saint Gerard is the patron saint for mothers. I started saying that novena "religiously" (no pun intended) from the moment we started the IVF process. I think it helped. I really do. I'm not even a Catholic but a was praying that novena like a bonafide Catholic everyday multiple times a day.
After that scare resolved I motored along just fine- I really felt okay- I was not having any morning sickness to speak of- just a little heartburn. I wrote in my journal on June 4th (7 weeks along)- "Mom brought me to get maternity clothes today. Still feels pretty unreal (being pregnant). I'll believe it when I can feel it. I guess I'm paranoid or I'm protecting myself- But this is all very surreal right now. I'm sure after we get past this 1st trimester I'll feel more secure. We'll see."

They heard the baby's heartbeat with the Doppler on my mother's birthday (June 10th) and then they could start weaning me off the Progesterone shots- my 1st trimester came to an end on June 24th. I was still feeling so worried and I wrote alot in my journal about how I didn't "feel or look pregnant."
I found out on August 10th when I was 17 weeks along that we were having a girl. We were so excited-I felt like the pregnancy was now legit!!
Another weird thing happened at my 28 week check- when they did the regular labwork they found warm antibodies in my blood- the concern being that my blood would attack the babies blood and cause her to become anemic. Now we have to see the perinatologist once a week for a fancy sonogram to make sure she is okay- this is fine with me - I love the sonograms and seeing her moving around in there- it makes me feel so much better!!
Around 31 weeks along I started to have some horrible rib pain. I swear it felt like she broke my ribs. It was miserable for about a week and then miraculously it stopped one day. I assume she moved! Finally at my 39 week check they decided that she was big enough (6 1/2 pounds by sonogram) and decided that I should go in the hospital on December 28th to be induced- exactly 1 week early. I was freaked out this was real- I was really going to be a mom. Yikes!!